Releasing a pent-up blog

Dearly beloved, we are gathered here today to mourn the passing of Florida State football.
Remember when the Seminoles were relevant and occupied a spot in the top five every year? Well, they just lost to Maryland to fall to 4-4. That means they’ve fallen off life support and into a pine box. Now they're just waiting to be covered by that last shovel full of dirt.
It's gotten so bad in Tallahassee that a long-time Florida State fan started www.retirecoachbowden.com in an effort to get Bobby Bowden to do what men his age usually do -- wear Bermuda shorts up to their necks, hit the early bird special at Piccadilly and drive slow in the left lane.
The Web site, which breaks from others like it in that it hasn't actually called for the coach's firing, reads: ‘‘We mourn the demise of Florida State University Semonoles football at the hands of its most trusted builder ...’’
Naturally, Bowden won't retire as long as Joe Paterno keeps plugging along and threatening to pass him as college football's winningest coach. Maybe they should form a gentleman's pact to both retire when they're tied atop the list. Then they could save their fan bases from watching two legends taking a wrecking ball to their respective legacies.
* I have a lot of pent-up blogging to do, so this will get kind of long. Between traveling and taking care of a couple home maintenance chores (ie. wife says ''Clean the gutters, dear'') there hasn't been much time for puttering around on the Internet.
Now that I'm in puttering mode, here are some other completely unconnected thoughts:
* Georgia football coach Mark Richt had this to say about his team's ugly offensive effort against Florida -- ‘‘We just got stuffed in the first half. It starts with me.’’
All season, Richt has conspicuously avoided self-criticism as his offense has sputtered against the likes of Colorado, Mississippi State and Co. He always chalked it up to dropped passes, turnovers and the like. Now that he's turning some blame inward, it's worth wondering if he'll turn play-calling over to a dedicated offensive coordinator next season.
* Strange thing in the aftermath of the Florida-Georgia game. Florida coach Urban Meyer said Sunday that the Gators’ scoreless second half and luckluster offense might have had something to do with a knock that QB Chris Leak took on the head. Meyer contends Leak played with a concussion, unbeknownst to coaches and trainers.
Leak maintains he didn't have a concussion, but says he had a severe headache and blurry vision.
Hmm. Blurry vision, severe headache, burned three second-half timeouts unnecessarily. I'm not doctor, but those sound like symptoms of a concussion.
* NBA commissioner David Stern provided the following advice to league players last week. When heading out in public, please, please, please leave your guns at home.
Wonder if he added that they shouldn't shoot the messenger.
It's silly that a pro sports commissioner would have to tell adult athletes to lock up their Glocks when going out night-clubbing, but recent events compelled him to say something. Indiana Pacers guard Stephen Jackson faces felony and misdemeanor charges for allegedly firing a handgun like Yosemite Sam outside a nightclub last month.
The world would be a much better place if NBA players would carry something less lethal instead, like nun-chucks or cans of silly string.
* A colleague of mine votes in the Harris Poll. As he input his ballot on the Harris web site after Saturday's Georgia-Florida game, he ommitted the Bulldogs from the top 25. A computer alert flashed on his screen: ''You had Georgia ranked 24th last week. Are you sure you want to do this?''
Uh, yeah, he did.
I guess the Harris Poll folks use the Hal 9000. All of those prompts could come in handy, however.
You could be in a press box, finalizing your ballot 300 miles from home, and the computer could ask: ''Did you remember to turn off the iron before you left home?''